Blog Saya

Received a few offline messages on YM this morning all along the lines of:

“Take a second to think. Why is it that we can have the discipline to study so arduously without having one to read the Quran? And how we can cook up the time to exercise but none for appreciating the Quran?”

Indeed forwarded in good faith, I could not help but getting mixed messages from those mere 3 lines of advice. I’m no toupe-wearing Shakespeare - I know where I sediment in the tank of artsy-fartsies - but just to dissect this a little further, I can see how this piece of advice can mislead people.

For starters, to compare reading the Quran/holy scripture with studying is a poor idea. Both are imperative in guiding people through life & both equally enlightening to the soul - like a maintenance engineer of the mind. Muslims are not encouraged to publicly perform their ibadahs for fear of dishonesty and showing off. However, there’s no word of foreclosure for studying in the open - a library, for instance. Therefore it is unfair to say a person does not devote time to God when his/her dealings of faith is encouraged behind doors in the first place.

Most Muslims today have failed to register the faith’s fervent advocation for knowledge. The first revelation to the then illiterate Prophet (pbuh) itself was on reading i.e. knowledge. Hence isn’t studying an act of carrying out the Quran’s discourse? No point reading the Quran when you do not carry out its preachings, ainnit? Therefore it is grossly ironic to say a person isn’t a good Muslim because he/she spends more time studying than reading the Quran. The Quran is literature. It isn’t meant to be read word by word, rather lines between lines. There’s a reason behind why the first revelation is on knowledge and why Quranic verses are intricately put in non-literal words - to encourage Muslims to THINK!

As for exercising and the Quran, by word, these are two totally different things. It’s like comparing a deodorant to a coconut tree. God has shelled our souls with a body - the very body that gets hurt when pinched, laughs when I pull an awesome joke and poops rice-water when infected with Cholera. With this shell, God has urged that we care for it and treat it with respect i.e. take good care of your health, avoid promiscuous behaviour and stop shoving silicone up places where they aren’t needed. Wouldn’t you think exercising conforms to this? Wouldn’t you think that with a healthy body, a healthy mind is assumed? Which later translates into clearer thinking, better judgments and good sense-making of life/faith? Of course, according to heavily evidence-supported studies (haha), not all body builders with biceps as big as my head are omg-pious or super intelligent, but hey, an egg alone doesn’t make a cake. There are so many other things making up a hollistic Muslim.

In short, construe an advice before sending it out for wrong interpretation. It’s not that I’m an ungrateful for the advice - “Omg, Nada’s such a bitch. She thinks she’s so smart that she cannot receive an advice. What a cow,” - I am grateful! I honestly, honestly believe it was sent out in good faith, but for the sake of others who might get the wrong idea interpreting the message, I would like to urge people to realize the power of words. A mere “I love you” changes everything (Gossip Girl S02).

So now that we’ve learnt the roots, let’s harvest the fruit:

“Take a second to think. Why is it that we can have the discipline to read porn magazines so arduously without having one to read the Quran? And how we can cook up the time to bad-mouth enemies but none for the Quran?”

Treading shallow water is safe, but sometimes you need to submerge in the deep to realize how much you need the air…just…don’t drown
 

PS: I’m back!

I have an idea for a new reality TV series. We gather 10 different personalities & 3 judges to comment on the contestants’ taste in music. Good idea? You know, since these days there are many over-confident people going round condemning other people’s taste in music so why not have a reality show for them to show off their fantastic good taste? Bodoh kot. Firstly, who are they to tell other people their music’s crap? Secondly, have they written good songs played on air? Thirdly, what level of intelligence gives them the thought that they listen to good music? Lastly, ada ke definition of good & bad music?

For starters, music is universal. There’s no such thing as noise. Even trucks hustling down a rocky pavement with drivers screaming in suara katak is music. Music is an expression of auditory communication. You may think ketuk-ketuk pinggan mangkuk kat belakang dapur is noise, but some people think it’s a song. Just because you lack the depth to appreciate something, doesn’t make you a person with good taste to judge others.

And what’s this about labeling girls who listen to hardcore songs? Salah ke? What, listening to mental impairing songs makes us less feminine? But wearing skimpy clothes, getting drunk & groping a guy all over without the sense of guilt does? Wtf? And listening to metal makes a person morally deficient? But being judgmental & throwing baseless comments on a person’s interest makes you morally supreme? Gila pe?

And so what if people listen to the Backstreet Boys? I listen to boy bands and adore Britney Spears. So I’m lame la? What is lame in the first place? Bila pulak you were made editor of the Webster Dictionary to define what’s what? Lame is a person who doesn’t know what’s going on. That’s lame. So instead of me, a boyband listener being lame, it’s you people who don’t even know the meaning of the word but label people who don’t fit the definition who are lame. Malu sangat nak admit they listen to pop. Tapi sibuk gila nak tell the whole world they listen to underground. Kira cool la if you listen to underground? "Ooh, I listen to underground. I’m so cool! My cicak roommate listens to Click 5. Gila High School Musical dia tu. Lame! Hihihihi!" Prft.

Look, if you’re afraid to admit who you are because you fear what people might think of you, why not you stay in a sangkar burung & never budge? Only then no one would know of your existence hence make no such judgments on you. This world is real la. Pretenders don’t last long. So what if your friends think you’re stupid for listening to music they don’t listen to? What, your sense in music determines where you’ll end up in life? "Ahmad dengar dangdut, sebab tu dia tak hensem-hensem".

Even if you really hate a certain genre (I admit I don’t like dangdut) but there are moral guidelines you should abide by as educated people.

1. Don’t label a person lame, immoral, unfeminine solely based on the music he/she listens to

2. If your fat mouth really can’t hold in the comment, don’t comment when the person is doing you a favour laaaaa e.g. serving you drinks, giving you a ride, entertaining your lonely grampa.

3. Don’t comment when you yourself lack a strong musical background.

The music you listen to doesn’t necessarily mould you into the image the music brings e.g. listening to A7X makes you goth, Rock Kapak makes you Mat Rempit, Marilyn Manson makes you anti-Christ, Britney makes you bald, Good Charlotte a father to a bastard and Mawi a Jawa. It’s all up to the listener if he/she wants to be easily influenced.

Just because you stand on the other side of the brink, it neither means you’re on higher grounds nor it means you have the privilege to splash water onto the other side. You think you’re so good? There are others better than you la dude.

Respect others man. Face the music. Baru boleh capai Wawasan 2020.

Why do we always hear complaints about government services? Why are most government workers lazy and hopeless in comparison to private ones? And why do the local workers often don’t get their work done?

I believe the answer is we Malays are cursed with the “lazy” or “take for granted” trait. I mean, crawl out from your narrow-mindedness and for once think on an open field before you start accusing me of being a racist against my own kind, how do you expect things to go well when workers aren’t serious about their jobs, always busy being in love going “Abang, saya lapar laaaaaaaa” in the office? The government is trying so bloody hard helping the Malays, stripping equal rights from the Chinese and Indians, but what do we give back in return? Lousy services and typical attitude that should be shoved away a long time ago. Bagi office cantik la, bumiputera discounts la what shit la, and we’re still lazing away. After several visits to two Government offices then and now, I’ve noticed extremely minimal change. Most officers are sitting on their office chairs, sipping coffee, gossiping about office mates or lame local celebrities and displaying embarrassing “gedik” attitude between sexes. Please la. “Abang, saya lapar la awak…jom la makan. Awak belanja!”. What the fuck man? You’re supposed to be working! Not wandering around making yourself cheap!

And the part I can’t accept is we can’t learn to be moderate – and this applies to all Malaysians. It’s either you’re too passé and narrow-minded or you’re too open, closing in to being wild.

Satu jenis tu tak nak berubah. They see changing as being obscene and having an open mind a lie. So they stick to their usuals – don’t speak English, duduk dekat rumah umpat pasal orang & bergaul dengan jenis dia saja.

Lagi satu tu over gila nak berubah. They change too much to prove to everyone they’re cool and have their minds too open that they forget to reserve some shame. So they manifest a new stereotype – speak too much English sampai cakap bahasa sendiri pun tersangkut-sangkut, keluar malam clubbing sampai Subuh habis & bergaul suka hati sampai hilang dara cara haram pun takpa. Religion is obsolete in this case.

Ok, back to the lazy government officers case. One piece of advice to you lazy bums: If you want to have fun instead of doing your job, retire, find yourself a pimp and do what you’re good at. Don’t strip off people from their rights then take it for granted. Sebab ko Melayu, jadi ko tak heran dapat kerja senang gila dengan kerajaan. Blah la. Nanti akhirat Tuhan tanya kau buat apa kerja kat dunia, kau nak jawab apa? “Oh, biasa la. Deskmate saya pakwe saya. Hari-hari kita menggedik bersama-sama kat ofis minum kopi, umpat orang pastu tak masukkan yuran biasiswa untuk pelajar”. It’s easy for you to say and do, having fun at the office while we’re down here worrying and scratching the scabies off our asses. Damn, you people are so selfish! You know, it’s a good thing I’m not the Prime Minister or something. Because if I was, I’d give equal rights to all races in Malaysia and wouldn’t give a fuck’s shit if you complain because I know you don’t deserve it. To hell with Bumiputera privileges. Oh, bila bab promote “Visit Malaysia”, bukan main lagi, “Kita negara berbilang kaum dengan warga Melayu, Cina, India dan bumiputera hidup dengan harmoni dan sentosa”. Tapi bila bab kerja, hak asasi, ekonomi, “Oh, Melayu dan bumiputera sahaja layak mendapat keuntungan ekstra”…“Oh, setiap syarikat besar mesti memenuhi kuota wajib pekerja bumiputera!”…and the list goes on.

Just one question, kita ni multi-racial country ke multi-racist country?

I understand what the government is trying to do – helping the locals to stand on their feet and I respect their noble intention but what we’re giving back, I can’t accept. So if you local workers can’t change for the better, I suggest you kill yourself and give those privileges and chances to other deserving people. If the Chinese and Indians can make it without extravagant help from the government despite being the minority in this country, why can’t we, the majority and the most helped-by by the government?

It’s time for us to open our minds and look through a wider scope. Jangan buat sambil lewa, berangan kahwin mat salleh pastu malam buat pesta dengan Mat Rempit. Use your privileges right or be doomed as a non-functional race.

You know you’re a backstabbing space-wasting piece of horse shit when you:

1. Say someone’s not good looking when you yourself look like zoo left-overs. A blind or severely ruptured eyesight person would be awfully nice to let you off with "average-looking".

2. Say someone’s fat/too thin when really, when was the last time anyone has ever complimented your figure? Besides the blind guy?

3. Lament stupid things like, "But she’s fat & ugly! She doesn’t deserve a good-looking boyfriend!". It’s called wonderful personality, smarty pants. Look it up. Looks ain’t everything. Besides, better ugly and nice than ugly AND ugly.

4. Complain a girl is too un-girlish or lacking demure (because they listen to Indie, wear black and hate make-up) when you snore so loud at night, you scare poor Boogey Man away.

5. Get all whiny when someone speaks too loud when you practically scream like a friggin’ rhino during labor on the phone that the person you’re gossiping about hears every syllable you say - TWO DOORS AWAY.

6. Talk about unneccessary things with your friends. You know, the details you can do without in conversations e.g. this person has a big butt, this girl has straight hair…SO??? Geez, if you really have nothing to say, then zip it!

7. Act all nice and come-and-have-scones-&-tea-with-me-then-we-can-dress-Molly-the-zombie-doll-up-together-at-Nanna’s-porch-later-today infront of friends but go round talking behind their backs.

8. Act like nothing happened after bad-mouthing your friend behind his/her back.

9. Tell everyone about Every. Single. Male who talked to you (whom you claim were flirting with you) when really, the listener:

- Doesn’t give a rat’s bottom about what you have to say. I mean, everyone knows the guys are blind…or bored.

- Thinks the guys are after stale cakes, since expired stuff are…well, cheap.

10. Claim your English is so good and condemn other people’s speech when really, what were you actually saying? Whoa, did you actually speak French? Omg, I so didn’t know you speak French!

11. Comment and rant about a person’s fashion sense when you’re the one with the gaudy shoes, the eerie-looking bling-blings, the cheap sunglasses (which look horrible on you btw) and the demented taste in colour combination.

*

*

I’m sorry for the harsh language. I suppose you can sum it up  by now that I am a bitch (sorry Liyana for over-powering you, haha). But sometimes a girl has to bitch to put another in place.

Back-stabbers and unnecessary gossipers should be shaved bald and pasted naked on gallows poles with Elephant Glue. If you have more to add to the list, please…be my guest. Letting out is always the best therapy to managing anger & depression.

PS: This post was in no way of putting blind people down. It’s a metaphor.

I swear the above phrase is gonna be in the next edition of "1001 Phrases of 2006". But yeah, why do we use English as a tool to impress? Kalau cakap Tamil tak glamour ke? Cina ke? Melayu ke?

Oh, ke sebab "we sound like bangang" kalau tutur bahasa sendiri?

What the celebrity said about the whole "sound like bangang" is downright appalling. Nak cakap muka dia macam mat salleh, rambut blonde keras bak berus jamban tak juga…hitam je, lembut lagi - rambut Asia pendek kata. Nak cakap tuturan Bahasa Inggeris dia hebat gila pun tak juga…rojak juga susunan ayat.

Our tradition is draining down the loo. Doesn’t take a genius with Superman vision to notice that. Baju kurungs are considered passe and out of fashion…when you meet a friend donning one, you go, "wah, perempuan melayu terakhir!". Why "terakhir"? Where are the other Malay girls? What, have they have gone extinct? Formed fossils? Passed away with some disease?

I’ll tell you what the disease is. It’s us.

Let’s start with what got me thinking of this whole tradition-down-the-drain thing. I was at the kitchen after one fine ass-inflating break fast (buka puasa) and was ranting about how disorganized Petronas Victoria is at informing students about the upcoming annual dinner. Ok, imagine me washing dishes…

                            *

Nada: <tengah gosok pinggan> Mentang-mentang la kita ni dok kampung (Clayton), tamau bagi tau. Bila kitorang tak tau pasal dinner ni, mula lah cakap kitorang ni kampung la, tu la, ni la. <Buat muka bengang> Kita tengok la nanti kat Malaysia siapa kampung siapa tak!

Izyan: <Tengah hisap botol susu…eh tak, tengah minum air dalam cawan> *Giggles* Tau la ko tu dok bandar…

                            *

That moment, I felt the urge to retaliate, felt like telling Izyan about how great the Sunway campus is gonna be compared to Melbourne - gonna be sticking my already proud nose up at the losers in Melbourne next year (siap plan nak call Yana & Izyan a.k.a. the Pink Squad tiap kali makan mamak lagi ok?) until I realized there was nothing to be proud of if I’m in Sunway or any other city in Malaysia, for that matter.

Think about it. What is so different about Malaysian cities compared to other cities in this globally-warmed world? We don’t have much identity left -  not anymore at least. Minimal culture. Minimal traditions. Nothing to distinct ourselves from the rest of the world. We have skyscrapers, congested traffics, English-speaking communitites, Prada-wearing mak datins [model courtesy of Izyan], people who skip their prayers, skimpy girls who look they’ve ran out of fabric, alcoholics etc i.e. things every other metropolitan has too. So tell me, what extra qualities does KL have to offer? What else does our "multi-racial" city have to offer? Us multiple races don’t even heed our traditions anymore.

Whatever happened to the girls who covered themselves modestly? The families who practiced their traditions so religiously? The young men who had so much respect for the girls, they wouldn’t even lay eyes, let alone touch them?

Hampeh taik kucing!

That’s what my late grandparents would say if they have to witness this ugly world today.

Maksiat merata. Depa tak takut Tuhan ka?

Memang diorang tak takut, Mak Tok, Pak Tok. Sampai kiamat pun diorang tak sedar kot.

Let’s not get into religion - that’s a whole other story. Now we’re talking tradition. Culture. The very assets our ancestors cultivated, preserved and cherished long before we screwed it up. You think all those wars our ancestors went through against the Portugese, British and Japanese were for nothing? Well. I guess they DID do it for nothing. Cuz here we are practicing the very culture they shed blood against.

Biarlah orang nak kata kita kampung, kuno, zaman Tok Kadok. Dah ini identiti kita. Yang dia nak jaga tepi kain orang tu kenapa? Oh lupa. Baju dia kan tak cukup kain. Kena tumpang kain orang. Kan? Macam tu kan?

Biarlah orang lupa daratan nak buat apa. Kita cuba genggam asas kita.

Diorang pakai baju pelacur, kita pakai baju kurung, sari, cheong sam kita.

Diorang cakap Bahasa Inggeris berhabuk, kita cakap Bahasa Melayu, Tamil & Cina kita - biar "sound like bangang" pon lantak diorang lah.

Diorang sambut Merdeka dengan mabuk dan clubbing dia, kita doakan kesejahteraan nenek moyang dan pemimpin kita yang berlawan untuk kemerdekaan kita.

Diorang menari pole dance, kita buat joget kita.

Diorang minum beer, kita minum todi. Muahaha. Tak ah. Kita minum sirap, teh tarik dan teh bunga kita.

The next Malaysian I see who carries the wrong interpretation of what our country is meant to illustrate will get a look of disgust from me.

Jangan perasan mat salleh. We’re not that genetically heinous to be one.

Wake up and bring our values back before they die for good.

…

Ha. Apa lagi? Undilah aku Perdana Menteri! Korang ni pon. Penat aku buat blog politik.

PS: Sorry for the mix-up of languages. Some things you just can’t express in English. Harap orang tak paham BM buat-buat paham. I mean, I hope non-Malay speaking friends of mine understand.

PPS: Terima kasih la banyak-banyak kat Izyan…hang la bagi inspirasi kat cek buat blog ni. So apa-apa hal mahkamah, dakwa minah gedik ni. Muahaha. Cek pon harap la banyak-banyak hang sukaaaaa nama hang cek letak warna merah jambu naa. Hang manis la dondon merah jambu. Macam gajus.

Mood: Horrible

Mental state: Unstable

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This year has not been a good year for me. Neither was last year, and the year before (especially the year before) and the year before. Hell, I only remember having fun when I was in the Debate team, Sri Acmar & Sri Bestari - where my friends were as straight up as they came & were not hiding behind fake facades to impress the rest of the food chain.

Everytime I observe fakes, questions always revolve - are they really like this at home? Does their family know they have a faker in the house? What would their dogs think if they found out their master is a ‘trying-hard-to-fit-in’ being, even they admit not doing such crap during mating season? Most of all, why can’t they be their normal selves? Geez Louise, what’s wrong with being yourself?

I hate fakes (pirated dvds are an exception, aight?). And I can come up with one whole damned volume of entries thrashing the kind of fakes or desperate "fit-ins", expressing how they resemble nails dragging down chalkboards. Even Freddy Krueger doesn’t give me shivers that intense. Now I’m not pointing this out to anyone in particular. I just tend to bottle up my feelings and when shaken up right, I just fizz & explode in general. And since I don’t burst into homicidal rages anymore, I’m letting my thoughts stream into electronic words.

Firstly, I despise fake accents that are too obviously faked. Even in movies, I can’t stand people faking an accent e.g. Bridget Jones’ Diary & a few Malay movies. I forgive Bridget Jones’ tho, due to the fact it IS meant to be in an English setting but the local movies? Plain pathetic ok? You can tell they’re trying really hard to sound like some professional.

"Ooh yeah, I speak English, see? And I know words. Impressed already?".

Prft, oh I would be impressed if your grammar wasn’t that fucked up and the bombastic words you used weren’t pronounced that weirdly. OMG, did I just say that? Sorry I’m not saying I’m so good in English - fuck, no. It’s just a means of communication and hey, it’s not that I’m trying so fuckin’ hard to sound like a pro speaker by putting in fake pronunciations, slurs & intonations. This is how I speak at home, and this is how I speak with the rest of the population (human population of course. I speak Cat with felines. Haha). Because I know even if I try to "impress" people with my fake "almost-sounding-like-English" speaking, there’ll be a time where everything slips off mode and really stupid pronunciation bloopers surface - one key element in detecting fakes. They slip off their usual fake accent and start to sound really funny. I’ve been through this, hell yeah. And I seem to catch myself amidst the urge to raise an eyebrow in disgust/surprise and the tendency to laugh my ass off so hard, there’d be only one side left at the end of it. So, for those who’re caught in this disease, get a grip. Your lame "accent" ain’t impressing anyone. Not me at least.

Secondly, guys who try really hard to make a face for themselves by proving they’re perverts. WTF, guys??? You think by whistling, winking your heinous beady eyes, blurting out incredibly plebeian phrases like, "larilah cik adik, jangan jalan saja" at girls who happen to pass by you, you’ll get the fish into the net? Fuck you! Haven’t you heard of human sense??? What are you caught in a time jam? It’s 2006, you morons! Being perverts don’t get you anywhere with girls. Unless you’re in Idiotsville then maybe you can get away with a few stakes, but then again, who can stand your attitude? So passe! And when I say this, it’s not just my personal view but the perspectives of the whole female community - perverts like yourselves don’t deserve to be in human form. I suggest it’s either you grow up or take a hike. Or even better, become a tree. At least you can help with the globe’s environmental issues instead of wasting more land and air space.

Lastly, people who try hard to fit into popular/cool groups despite being the total Yang of the group’s Yin. Dammit man. Even rats know hamsters aren’t their kind. There’s nothing wrong with making friends. Heck, it’s perfectly noble. But please be sincere with it. You befriend a person because of who the person is, how he/she relates to you, how the person can be there for you at times of shit and how well the relationship can be maintained when things go fray. You don’t befriend a person because you wanna be cool. You befriend a person because you wanna belong. It saddens me to see someone desperately trying to fit into a puzzle when every edge & colour of him/her just screams "NO FIT". Even sadder, when the group looks so bloody obvious they want him/her out. I understand it’s freakin’ hard to find someone who really understands & clicks with you (trust me, it took me years to know someone familiar to me), but please don’t make it look so obvious you’re desperate because in the end your intention to be cool just turns you cold. Be natural. Only then a person can judge you as who you really are. The last thing you want happening is getting misjudged by who you’re not.

All in all, nevertheless the cliche of this all, I just gotta say "Be yourself". If you wanna impress anyone with whatever mojo you have in your pocket, just ensure the person’s not me…unless you’re a natural (I like naturals :D).

Til then, it’s pancakes for me for breakfast.

-

Bugger & out.

The poles must be inverted cuz there’s definitely something not right - friends have turned to foes, lovers transmuted to haters, Australia is in the World Cup, Izyan can’t stop mentioning ‘pink‘ & I’m listening to Nick Lachey (Gawd!). The point is, things take their turns without us expecting them.

One day it’s this, the next day it’s that.

One time your pal’s cool with you, the next she’s trashing you behind your back.

Now I’m not saying this is a current personal experience, no no. Anyone can trash me anytime they want, it’s not like I give a damn, cuz I know if they’re intending to put me down, they’re just wasting their time. I mean, if you wanna trash someone, make sure the person actually gives a fuck about it ok? Bitching about without anyone heeding you is plain pathetic. It’s like farting in the elevator and not being acknowledged for - what a heartbreak.

Now I’m not targetting this specifically at anyone for any matter…there are too many of you friends of mine who are entangled in non direct-contact brawls amongst yourselves, so even if I bring this subject up, you wouldn’t know which ones I’m aiming my sniper at - so consider this a general shout out.

For one, to err is human & to forgive is divine (See 2004 a.k.a. the best English teacher alive).

So if a friend of yours screwed you (not literally screwing, aight?), he/she’s just being human. Everyone makes mistakes. If you don’t tell them they’re screwing you up, they’d keep screwing you & that’d be you asking for your own shit to clean up.

And if you’re the culprit who’s screwing your friend up, and you KNOW you’ve screwed up, don’t be afraid to apologize. It may cost you your ego, but it’d make you look most providential & divine in the eyes of others.

As for the other side, for God’s sakes, when someone apologizes, please forgive. The poor lad has stripped him/herself out from his/her ego to seek forgiveness, so don’t crush his/her hopes. Sorry to say, but you non-forgivers are illustrating an ugly image of Islam (yes, my friends who refuse to forgive are Muslims). Please don’t convey the idea that our religion doesn’t preach forgiveness cuz it does - how does 234 citations on forgiveness, 79 on mercy & 50 on peace in the Quran sound? Muhammad (peace be upon him) even forgave the very people who threatened his LIFE, and now you people can’t forgive a friend who hasn’t even come close to touching your donkey? It is not even a point of them killing you!

The least you can do is to either forgive OR tell the world you’re a Muslim who refuses to follow that ONE religious teaching on forgiveness. Don’t make the rest of the community suffer the consequences of your own obstinance.

By far, I’ve come across 4 incidents of this friend-against-friend crises. And frankly, it’s not that I wanna nag like a mom or nythin’ (tho I’d love to be the mom to Brandon’s children. Nyahaks!), but it hurts to see 2 individuals, both relevantly close friends of yours to be in bad terms, alrite? What’s worse is having one to apologize and not being accepted by the other. And you can’t take sides because it’d just further insult the injury…yet, the responsibilities of being a friend, social citizen & religion pursuer drag you the otherway.

And to prevent myself from going up to both parties and start a ‘peace-making-gone-disastrous‘ situation:

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N: Be good you bitches/sonnuvabitches! This ain’t how we’re goin down, dawgs! You feel me?

X: Get yo punkass out of our business, bitch! Nobody hollerin’ you in our business! So you groovin’ or you scrammin’?

*

Ok, that’s roughly the scene I had in mind - with a touch of smooth Black attitude. Gawd, their style’s hot. Now you know why I’m hooked to Prison Break. "Yo get your punkass outta here!" Nyahaks. So cool.

Ok, seriously now…hold up, what was it again? Right.

Dear friends, please be at peace! Learn to for-freakin’-give! You may have other friends (who are stupid enough to on-go the situation instead of plugging it) to support you; to stab your ass like devils, conniving you to carry on the battle - hell, you may have already formed one whole lame squad of the Power Rangers to help you fight against your nemesis, but please freakin’ bear in mind, you, your contender & your Power Rangers squad aren’t the only parasites sucking the life out of this place called earth. Your doings have effects on others as well. So put into con-freakin’-sideration about the consequences your actions may have on 3rd parties. You may be enjoying every last drop of your ego’s desires in putting your ‘hated one’ down, but freakin’ radio yourself, your Royal Selfishness, there are us by-standers who are suffering the aftermath too!

So maybe some jokers enjoy gossiping about your flaming argument…but for the rest of us who have the brains to know what’s right & what’s not, want you to settle things out. Pronto!

If you still refuse to settle ‘em, then DON’T MAKE IT PUB-Freakin’-LIC! Announcing your refusal to forgive publicly & go on ranting about the other side only makes you look more pathetic than pathetic itself.

So take this call & clean up all your shit you left along the trail. We ain’t stepping on nor sniffing any of them no matter how rosy they smell.

And if you still refuse to forgive, hell, you go on ranting & complaining how pissed your balls (or cunt for that matter) are at this blog, sure, go on. It’s your problem anyways, ainnit? As how most stereotypes like to put it, "It’s my life!etc".

Oh, stuff it. Don’t make that phrase look like the only English phrase you know.

Bottomline is, consider this an advise from me - a friend who begs for some peace. Enough with the Palestinians having to live through hardship - you don’t have to ’smartass-ly’ make a new agenda of your own. I know you lack attention and you’re dying to earn some.

However, this is just some stupid blog nobody can give a shit about. It’s entirely up to you to decide whether to forgive or not, the latter signifying what happens starting here is entirely between you & God. Whatever He tells you, don’t say I didn’t warn you.

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PS: Goin’ a lil off-track here…but yeah, I’d LOVE to pick up some street language. You know, the whole "yo momma’s punkass dawg be rollin’ ova at ma crib wit da bling-bling" kinda attitude? Rocks man. Gawd, why was I not born Black? Then again, Alhamdulillah I’m sure God has other plans for me. Ngehehe…you feel me, G? Aiiiigghhhttttt…

…Another day, another time wasted.

You know, I think I’m getting the hang of things. I’m still reading notes while listening to soul-impairing music & am still writing bloody blogs 2 days before major exams. But yeah, Nada studying so hard that her crap hardens to form fossils ain’t the Nada people know. In fact, anything that’s not a tingly-bit like Nada destructs the whole Nada image.

Aaaaaahhhh…new inspiration for writing here. Imma talk about individual polarities i.e. how two ends of a person’s attributes still fall within the person’s personality spectrum…shit I don’t make sense. Ok, I’ll try to make this clear.

I have a housemate. Her name is Izyan. She’s a girl. Oh wait, this is not Malay, of course you’d know my housemate’s a girl when I addressed her as ‘her’ & ’she’. ANYWAYS, Izyan is a sweet feminine girl and I’m not saying this because I know she transforms into a bloody vampire at night and would suck the erythrocytes out of my arteries if she knows I told the world she’s a freakin’ blood-sucker. I’m saying this because I really do think highly of her (and because she has PayPal :P). Anyways, despite her being a defined woman (she cooks, she’s self-contained, she likes kids etc), Izyan is an avid hater of pink. Mention the word pink and she’ll regurgitate all the meals she had for the day. Yes, no matter how feminine my friend here is, she hates pink - the stereotyped colour for the sex with boobs (guys taking estrogen pills are excluded).

What I’m trying to get across here is, a person may be a specific definition of him/herself…but even attributes that are the exact definition of the exact personality disregards the person. Take my housemate example above, she’s feminine, yet she hates pink. But she’s still the feminine legend everyone knows.

Now go on and think of a personality a friend have described for you. Then think of the epitome of the described personality & relate it to yourself.

If you still don’t know what I’m trying to convey, let me help you out.

Say, someone described you as funny.

So what’s the apex of the personality ‘funny‘?

Making people laugh, say.

Relate it to yourself. If you really do make people laugh, then you are what people think you are. But if you constantly find yourself laughing alone at your own jokes while others give you that ‘was-that-even-a-joke?’ look, then reframe yourself.

Same goes if people think you’re rich but you rely on your dad’s money.

Or when people describe you as cute but you have the ugliest God-forbidden toes ever tinted in the books of history.

Bloody hell. I think I just snapped back to reality.

What in the name of my chemical disaster have I written?

Ok people, close this window and pretend you didn’t read a word out of this blog.

Till then, back to downloading videos!

Thank you for wasting your time (mine isn’t).

Joga Bonito!!!

Nyahaks. Wonder if any of you gagged at the sight of this blog’s title.

Nyhoo, I’m actually studying biology, sociology & shit (Kme jangan gelak! Aku memang blaja ok?). Great news is, paper’s on Friday, and I just started today i.e. Tuesday…oh, and the material is thicker than both Pam Anderson’s silicones stacked together.

So what do people who refuse to study do?

<extends ear to surrounding>

What’s that I hear? Write blogs? Like, eww??!

OK. This blog’s getting lame by the second.

Ok. Ok. Ok. I got it. Let’s talk about marriage…

Nak kawen Brandon bley?

Kalau tak, mamat Indon hot bagaikan Ariel Peterpan.

Kalau tak, mamat Johor yang boleh zapin bagaikan hero dalam mimpi kayangan.

Kalau tak…

Ok, Nada, STOP. You’re getting stupid. It’s almost midnight. Aaaaaaaaahhhh…no wonder the stupidity…bedtime’s 3 hours ago. Sigh.

Wargh! BOSAAAAAAAAAAAANNN!!

Guys, just leave a comment so that this blog isn’t as pathetic as it is. Thnx!

Love’s an abstract we have to manoeuvre our way through. The tangles, the hurdles & of course, the sweetness leave us fresh prior to agendas ahead.

…Like, dude…Did you even get what I said? Cuz I didn’t.

Nway, back to what this entry’s title suggests, I think I’m in love…okay, so maybe ‘love’ is a little too drastic, but yeah, I’m in a current swirl of emotions, alrite. I never knew someone who I barely know (heck, I’ve never even met him) could cause me to be in such an embroiled mess I’m in now. Before this, the sight of couples sitting together doing things that annoy God BIG TIME would have me sulking and thanking fate for not involving me in such non-sense.

But life has its turns. And now it’s mine to take the turn. I’m not saying I’m now supporting God-forbidden doings between unmarried Adams & Eves - no way I am - but yeah, it strikes me once in a while too ya know - the thought of having someone by your side. No need for words, the vibes of his presence is just enough to penetrate the crux of your heart and palpitate it so hard, you forgot how it felt failing your first Additional Math test (I’m not saying I did fail Add.Math…tho I almost did ;P).

I’ve loved God, His prophets & Islam for as long as I can remember. And I wouldn’t take too huge a step in my power exasperating them…but even the Quran says humans were made weak…and I’m just the defining end of that expression - weak. I am aware it is my weakness for failing to arrest my unnecessary needs. My weakness for failing to restrain myself from falling for one of His creations. My weakness for failing to keep myself from listening to jiwang songs on my ‘My Music’ folder (tapi tak banyak la lagu jiwang in my folder pon…betol! Tak tipu!). My weakness for failing to hinder myself from picking up my guitar (Hehe. Gitar Fitri sebenarnye…saja je bagi gempak) and come up with some seriously goosebump-raising love numbers - and of course singing horribly along with em scary renditions e.g. Love Song, Only Hope, I Miss You etc. And my weakness for failing to pick myself up again after a nasty fall.

I fell hard.

And no matter how I think I’m strong enough to pick myself up again, I can’t escape the truth that I’m not able to.

Brandon, you’re in sooooo much trouble. Why do you have to be so cute and talented??!!

PS: You didn’t think I was actually blabbing about some real person I’m having a crush on did you? Dude…Brandon’s the one and only maaann…Oh! The lead from 311’s HOT too! And that Klim guy from the Australian aquatics team! Hihiks!

PSS/PPS/WTV!: Who thinks I should start a love novel, hands up!!! ;P

GAWD, this anti-climax thing is fun! Meow!